And so one day, share life together.
They obviously have like memories, expectations, preferences.
One day, they have to make decisions on like where to go on the vacation,
What hotel to stay in,
Where to go for like dinner.
That can be tension you know between them.
So one of the things that we asked them to do in the couple counseling
workshop is to sit down and talk about a childhood experience, and
try to maximize the similarities, right.
So for instance, we will ask the husband to think of
situations in his childhood. Even though he was privileged,
there would be like moments when he also felt frustrated and deprived,
and those are the things that he could share with his partner, and
you know establish some emphatic connection.
We also would encourage the wife to help her husband,right,
understand that you know happiness is like not always
predicated on material resources.
And so we basically got them through a process of like sharing
childhood experiences that had an impact on them, but
like trying to get on to what is like common between them.
That would be like go outside of the material conditions, but
look at the subjective emotional experience.
So the essential core beliefs that we have in SSLD
is that although differences in biodiversity or
given facts, but another equally real aspect of human
life is that we always have something in common.
So like negotiating this similarity and
difference is both as we say, right, like an art and a science.
So, we try to bring it together and
help people negotiate you know a relationship that would work for them.